That annoying clicking noise: I’ve narrowed it down to my hip bone, or a small animal living in my seat tube

I’ve written about an annoying clicking noise coming from my bike before, and I’ll no doubt do it again.

The fact is, even the best bikes with the most expensive kit bolted on to them will, occasionally, drive you to the brink of homicide with an unwelcome noise that moves around the bike with each component that you grease, tighten, or replace.

Have you been in Spain at any point during the last three weeks?

Have you found yourself disturbed by a faint clanking-scrape-y sound as you sipped your Sangria and scoffed your calamari?

I’m led to believe that was Chris Froome’s bike.

The Team Sky mechanics were sacked, one by one, through the duration of the race, as they took it in turns to fail to diagnose the source of the irritant.

Managing to win the Vuelta Espana whilst simultaneously enduring the mental torment of a clicky-bike is undoubtedly the waggly-elbowed Kenyan’s finest hour. He won’t get the credit he deserves, of course, but such is his lot in life.

As for me, I’m currently on week number three of annoying-clicky-bike 2017.

Thankfully, through a meticulous process of careful problem solving and prayer, I believe I’ve narrowed the source down to one of two areas.

The noise is either being produced by my 41 year old hip bone, or a small animal has made its home in my seat tube; possibly a Spanish creature – a refugee from my Mallorcan cycling holiday this year.

And so, without further delay, I have cashed in my savings and booked myself in for a hip replacement with a private health care provider. I specified on the form that a carbon fibre hip will be just fine, but that I will only accept Campagnolo – and to hell with the cost.

Once the new hip has been attached and indexed, I am confident the click-mare, for me, will be over for another year.

If, however, it turns out to be a mis-diagnosis, then I suppose I’ll just have to investigate the seat tube and disturb whatever life form is nesting in there.

Either way, at least I’ll have my new Campagnolo hip.

That should be worth a few Kudos’ on Strava.

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(Image: via pixabay.com)